Ted Stevens, Alaskan King Crab

The IRS and the FBI raided his home and he's caught up in a ever-expanding corruption scandal in Alaskan politics. So how has Sen. Ted Stevens (R-AK) handled the heat? He snapped at the press. It's their fault, don't you see?!

I can understand liberals' complaints about unfair and imbalanced press, because goodness knows, liberal media bias doesn't exist. But Stevens' whining about unwarranted and overdone media coverage of him and his son's slimy activities? Hell, the King Crab from Alaska deserves all the scrutiny he's gettin' and more. Stevens clacked his claws during his Anchorage Daily News interview:

[Snips below the jump]

...Stevens grew testy when a reporter suggested that the level of interest in the state's senior senator was high because so many Alaska politicians and public figures had been caught in the wider corruption probe. Also, as the longest-serving GOP senator in history, and the former chairman of the Senate Appropriations Committee, Stevens has a higher profile than the average Washington politician.

In the interview, Stevens made vague threats to the people who have suggested that he and his son, former state Senate President Ben Stevens, might be guilty of some sort of wrongdoing. The younger Stevens hasn't been charged with a crime, but his name has come up repeatedly in court proceedings. Plea documents in Allen's own case say that payments of $243,250 the Veco CEO made to Ben Stevens were bribes in exchange for "giving advice, lobbying colleagues, and taking official acts in matters before the Legislature" when the younger Stevens was a state lawmaker.

"Your papers print (the names of) those people who have been convicted and my son's name and mine at the same time. As far as the public is concerned, it's all the same ball of wax," Stevens said. "I'm not going to comment on that ball of wax."

"But we've been included in a way that I hope people understand the laws that are doing it," he said. "Because when it's all over, some people are going to have to account for what they've said and what they've charged us with."

It was unclear whom Stevens was threatening. When asked if he meant libel or perjury, Stevens said: "No. I'm just saying there are ways to account for this in the future."

When asked if he meant political retribution, he remained vague:

"I think the people out there ought to worry about that the way I worry about the investigation. There are myriad things you can do. Just a myriad of things."

Jeso Pete! Not only is King Crab a kook, but he's creepy, too. One wonders: Is Stevens thinking about urging the politicized DOJ to trash his enemies? Attack Democrats who have been consulting with Anchorage Mayor Mark Begich to run against crabby ol' Ted? Will he appeal to loyal Bushies to wiretap ADN reporters? The latter isn't beyond wild speculation. Come to think of it... sadly, none of these offhand questions seem far-fetched given the ascendancy of Republican corruption and disregard for the rule of law.

WaPo also reported that Ted is "a skeptic about human causes of climate change." Arctic drilling and oil executive bribes, I'm sure, haven't influenced Stevens' position.